DISCOVER YOUR MEANING
Now you are going to take an important step on your new path. This may seem odd at first, especially if you’ve tried a variety of approaches to become healthier. Please try to set aside your doubts and trust that you have everything you need inside of you to make healthy choices. Moving forward with trust in yourself may be scary, but I assure you, you will become more confident and capable as you practice listening to yourself.
Why Do You Want Optimal Health?
You continually get messages which influence you. Today more than ever, you are inundated by social media, traditional media, advertisers, so-called influencers and, not to mention, the ideas and opinions of your family, friends and peer group. You are a social animal and you have adopted, at least some, of other people’s views about diet and exercise. It’s time to decide which ones to keep and which ones do not serve you.
The Next Step
The following questions will reveal how the messages of your family, friends and society have shaped how you view good health. Grab some paper and a pen. Please write this by hand rather than typing it on a device to draw out your truth.
Give yourself a minimum of 20 minutes alone in a quiet atmosphere to complete these questions. Write freely and without judging what emerges as you go through this process. The answers will reveal how you approach caring for your health.
1. Think back to your childhood. What spoken and unspoken messages did you get about exercise and diet?
Give yourself a few minutes to ease into this one. I know it may seem silly to remember your childhood views on health, but many of the internal memes you struggle with today were created then. Let’s bring them up, so you can move beyond them.
2. How did the healthy people in your life act? What, did you assume, did they think and feel about their state of health?
Like myself, you may struggle to think of examples of healthy people, who were around in your formative years. No worries, what about the uncle who was active as a farmer, the aunt who liked to hike or your dad, who used a push mower? Even if they were not eating well or moving enough, who in your life tried to care for themselves?
3. What do you see when you think of the images in the media of healthy people? Are they real?
It helps to have a picture in your head because we are primarily sold the idea of health with pictures.
4. What do the “experts” in science and the media tell you good health is?
I love science, but I know what is accepted as true changes. After all, we used to think the earth was flat. Consult the experts, do your own research, but most of all, think for yourself.
5. What does good health mean to you?
Based on your answers, what do you think good health is to you at this moment in time. Do you see how you’ve been influenced positively and negatively?
Your Meaning
If you were surprised by what emerged from this process, you aren’t alone. Memories are influenced by the perspective from which they were imprinted. For instance, an event which stirs a strong emotion like love, joy or anger will form a vivid impression, but a lazy day on the couch might be forgotten in a few days. However, while you may remember the big events of your life, such as birthdays, holidays, weddings and graduations, it is the day-to-day thoughts and choices which have long-lasting effect.
When it comes to your perspective of health, it is the commonplace incidents, particularly when you were a child, which leave a lasting impression. A great example is my son, Jacob.
When Jacob was young, he wasn’t the healthiest eater. Like many kids, he didn’t want to touch vegetables. Even when his mom and I snuck them into his macaroni and cheese, he’d somehow know and would turn up his nose. When we had salad, the only way he wanted it was covered in ranch dressing. And the only thing he liked better than mac and cheese? Corndogs.
The challenge of getting him to eat well continued into his teenage years, which is not surprising. Then something changed. I had always worked out, even before becoming a personal trainer, and by my late 20’s was getting a handle on my struggles with food, which meant both his mom and I ate well and exercised when he was young. Is this why he suddenly started eating well and working out when he was 17?
About the time he graduated from high school he went from a diet with large amounts of corndogs, whole milk and cereal to clean protein, vegetables and no sugar. It is reasonable to deduce that the example set in our house led him to the change in behavior when he was older. The point is, the experiences you had when you were a child resonate throughout your life.
External to Internal Motivation
Jacob’s change came as a result of the external examples of his mom and me and, more importantly, because of his internal motivation. He clearly had a strong internal motivation (mmm…girls? Ha ha) because he eats well to this day and works out on a regular basis. His positive, internal motivation was based on his enjoyment of exercise, the social aspect of working out with his friends, the sense of accomplishment he gained by lifting more and running longer, and because he felt better when he ate well. These personal rewards have now guided his behavior into adulthood.
You might say, “not everyone grows up with parents who set a positive example for healthy living.” You are correct. However, I contend his long-term adoption of this lifestyle is because of the positive and immediate returns he continues to get from taking care of himself. They are not limited to the ones listed above, and they have formed the foundation of his behavior.
How about a little science? A study published in the International Journal of Behavioral Nutrition and Physical Activity found a negative association with exercise (i.e. “it’s hard,” “I have to be a size 2,” “I’m fat”) reduced the frequency of exercise among participants. Moreover, a delayed payoff for exercise (i.e. a reduced chance of heart disease, losing the next 10 pounds) also hurt long-term adherence to an exercise program.
What makes this kind of behavior even worse? Long term, using these external and vague “motivations” make every stop and start a negative validation. What this does is create reinforcement for what you don’t want, which is to not move and eat poorly. You’ve simply manifested an unwanted result because of the negative associations you linked with exercise and a healthy diet.
Watch for the next installment in this series of posts from EMPOWERED.